Month seventeen: an observation of flying time

June 2nd, 2007 | Tagged:

I go back to work in five weeks. What the hell happened to all the time?

We’re still waiting for her to get into talking. We think she has a word – apple. It sounds like “ahh-pahh”. And she makes the sound while pointing out pictures of apples in books.

It would be great if she liked to eat apples too. but more on that later.

I am feeling somewhat vexed about going back to work.

I am feeling relieved. Especially after this week. Mallory was sick, from Monday to Friday. All play dates, Mothercraft sessions, everything cancelled. Entire mornings spent carrying clingy baby who won’t sleep unless dosed with Ibuprophen. Nights of six wakings or one and two hour efforts to get her back to sleep.

I tell you – attachment parenting is a great idea for newborns but I reckon the parents of toddlers start to get a little tired of the idea of being attached to 25 pounds of person.

But I am also feeling miserable. I feel like I’ve let the time flit by without making enough effort to teach, to bond and to love Mallory. Like maybe if I read to her more, or talked to her more she might have more words than one.

In July we’ll be giving her over to the care of the teachers at a child care centre – we feel really fortunate to have a spot at Glebe Parents’ Day Care – it’s a great place and I think Mallory will love it there.

I worry I haven’t done enough to get her ready. I worry that she’s going to stop loving me when I leave her there. I worry that I’m going to resent getting all the sick weeks and none of the fun. I worry that I won’t be around when Mallory learns to say daddy.

The one good bit about this past week was dealing with Centretown Community Health Centre. They have a weekends and after hours phone number that you can call if you or your almost-17 month old child is ill and you need help.

I think the idea is to keep people from going to emergency. Anyway, you call, they page a doctor (the doctors from all the area community health centres seem to take turns being on call), and the doctor calls you back, usually in under half an hour.

If a visit is warranted, you meet at a clinic, or as this weekend’s on-call doctor offered, the doctor comes to your house. Yes, a house call. Astounding. I’ve always really loved and trusted their staff and their services but this takes all.

7 Comments »

7 Responses to “Month seventeen: an observation of flying time”

  1. Catherine Says:
    June 7th, 2007 at 12:43 pm

    Hey Chris, reading this post made me weep and grin. You will be around to hear her say daddy, and hard as it is to believe being there for all those sick days will help her feel more confident on the good days. Ditch the co-sleeping and get yourself several good night rests – very important for you, baby and your sweetie pie. Time does fly and you have done a huge amount of teaching to Mallory just by your very presence. You are a very calm and comforting presence for her – she learns by example. Lucky girl. Take care and enjoy each moment. Love loulixoxo

  2. Peter Nixon Says:
    June 25th, 2007 at 12:18 pm

    Chris:

    Relax, dude. It’s amazing to realize that children learned to walk and talk for centuries without parents having read the “What to Expect” series or making use of Baby Mozart. Not to mention surviving to adulthood without car seats. If you did nothing more than feed her, clothe her, and hold her in your arms and sing to her, the odds are overwhelming that everything will turn out just fine. I’m not against “attachment parenting,” but sometimes I worry that approaches like that create a lot of guilt in parents who are generally doing just fine.

    You’ll get lots of times to hear you call you “daddy,” and butterfly kisses, and dances, and piggyback rides, and demands that you sing her to sleep, and requests to draw all kinds of things, and even times when she’ll walk in with a baseball cap on backwards and ask you “Hey daddy, do I look hip hop?” (at age 6, no less!).

    So get some sleep.

    Peter

  3. Greg Elmer Says:
    June 3rd, 2007 at 12:00 am

    …just wait, she'll be asking for the keys to the car soon. :-)

  4. Greg Elmer Says:
    June 3rd, 2007 at 12:00 am

    woops, forgot, she's already behind the wheel no?

  5. Chris Lawson Says:
    June 3rd, 2007 at 12:00 am

    Yeah, but we haven't installed the toddler pedal blocks yet.

  6. Greg Elmer Says:
    June 3rd, 2007 at 12:00 am

    As long as we're talking hybrid here, I'm ok with it.-GE

  7. Audra Williams Says:
    June 5th, 2007 at 12:00 am

    5 months has gone by crazy fast for me, too.

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